[He's about to say yes, that nothing is worth this horrible pain, not friendships or allies or even colleagues. But the words die on his tongue. These are good people-- at least most of them-- and maybe he was starting to consider them friends. The thought of forgetting them, being isolated in a cell or a Foundation lab leaves him aching unpleasantly.]

... I don't know. I wish....

[He stops again, afraid to even say those words. What if speaking a wish out loud brings Nirrti? Erhard isn't sure he's a good enough man to refuse her.]

I don't want to remember Akira that way. But that's who he turned out to be, so wanting something different is foolish.